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当孩子们钢琴学成后,我踏上了学琴征程

After my kids stop playing piano, I started to practice
来源: 大中报 南茜(Nancy Jin)



从贝多芬的月光奏明曲到肖邦的小夜曲,美妙的旋律从我家客厅的钢琴键盘上婉婉流出,将死寂的房间变成音乐天堂。我坐在钢琴旁的摇椅上欣赏着孩子们的演奏,深深地被感人的琴声打动。我在月光下的河流中徜徉,在宁静的音符中享受着灵魂的安详。激荡起伏的音乐主题与我产生了共鸣,让我感触到人类征程中的挣扎和痛苦,而充满活力的激情旋律又激励着我去战胜困境,迎接挑战。

From Beethoven’s moonlight sonata to Chopin’s nocturnes, beautiful melodies run through the keyboard of the piano in my family room, turning my home into a music paradise. I sat on the rocking chair next to the piano watching and listening to my children playing, deeply immersed in it. I allowed the moonlight rivers to flow through my heart and enjoyed the serenity tones that comforted my soul. I resonated with the turbulent themes revealing the struggles on a human journey and was inspired by the passionate flows to strive and achieve.



但随着孩子们长大成人并忙于追求学业,美妙的钢琴旋律渐渐终止了。他们灵活漂亮的双手不再触摸琴键,而我最中意的那些曲子也像繁花尽落,过眼烟云般在我的音乐世界中消失。随之,我生活中最惬意最快乐的时光也被寂寞和空虚所取代。坐在摇椅上的我,眼睁睁地盯着那架被冷落的空琴,默默追思它的短暂生命,哀悼它的不幸死亡。

But piano melodies have gradually disappeared as my children grew up and were busy pursuing their academic careers. My favorite songs slipped out of their music album, and their beautiful hands no longer touched the piano keyboard. The most cherished moments were replaced by unbearable silence and emptiness.  Sitting on the same rocking chair, I would stare at the abandoned piano for minutes on end, grieving for its death and mourning its short life.



弹钢琴是我儿时的梦想。但成长在食不果腹之年代的中国,钢琴这类乐器可是极为昂贵的奢侈品,是普通中产家庭可望不可及的。来的加拿大后,我和许多其他同辈一样,重拾儿时旧梦,将我们未能实现的期望寄于下一代,并带他们踏上了一条十年之久的学琴之路,终使他们在钢琴领域学有所成。

Playing the piano was my childhood dreams. But growing-up at the time when food was a daily struggle, a music instrument like a piano was an extremely privileged commodity beyond the reach of a middle-class family in China. After immigrating to Canada, I, like many parents, picked up the pieces of our childhood dreams, transferring my unfulfilling ambitions to my two children and taking them on a decade long journey to become accomplished pianists.

回想起来,这学琴征程洒满了泪水和血汗。他们双双从五岁起学琴,从来没有让恶劣的天气成为逃课的借口,或学校沉重的功课压力作为不练琴的原因。失败和挫折是学琴过程中的常客,不是考试时演奏不佳就是竞赛中丢掉奖杯,但他们慢慢学会接受这些挑战,把失败当成培养自己从跌倒中爬起并继续前行的机会。当然,他们取得的成就也是他们努力得到了回报的最佳证明。

In retrospect, that journey involved blood, sweat, and tears. Starting to learn piano from the age of 5, they never allowed the stormy weathers as excuses for skipping the classes, nor the heavy school workload to become the reasons for suspending practices. Setbacks and failures – from a faltering performance at music test to losing a championship in competitions– were the norm, and they’ve learned to accept them and even turn them into motives to adapt and grow. Of course, their success and achievements were the testaments that their efforts had been paid off.



威尼斯船歌是我女儿在Kiwanis比赛中首次亮相的曲目。她感情丰富技术完美的表演让听众如醉如痴,在威尼斯游船上,他们尽情领略了时而波澜壮阔但时而有平静温婉的欧洲运河的风骚。当她手持金色奖杯站在领奖台上时,我和她的老师激动得相拥而泣。

Venetian Boat Song was my daughter’s debut at Kiwanis contest. Her emotional enriched and flawless performance took the audiences on a journey down the Venice Canal, escaping to the sometimes rocking and sometimes tranquil wild river.  As she held her golden trophy cup on the stage, her teacher and I hugged each other in tears.

我儿子在由5名考官监考的ARCT考场进行了长达数小时的演奏,当我看到他身着汗水沁透衬衫走出考场时, 不禁泪流满面。在他拿到那一纸标着课外钢琴学业最高成就的证书的一刻,兴奋之情溢于言表。那天当晚他弹琴至午夜,让他激动的心情流淌于飞舞的指尖上,融合于欢快的节奏中。

Tears were streaming down my face when my son walked out the ARCT exam room in sweat-soaked shirt, after hours of performance in front of five RCM examiners. When his certificate – marking the pinnacle of achievement of extra curriculum -- came in, his excitement was beyond expression. Eventually, he managed to let out his emotions by flying his hands at the piano until late at night.



而今天被寂寞感深深笼罩的我,默默地打开他们被尘土覆盖的的钢琴课本,并把手指放在琴键上,开始按照他们老师教的授课程序,从音节到练习曲到演奏曲一点点操练起来。客厅内再次响起的钢琴声给我了莫大的快乐和慰籍。逐渐地,我学会了弹奏一个又一个曲目,虽然这些曲目在他们眼中都属于启蒙阶段。

But with the silences soaring in the piano room today, I started to put my fingers on the keyboard, picking up their piano books buried under dust – from formula patterns to study albums to repertoires – and trying to follow their piano learning paths. The reviving of the piano sound has brought me tremendous joy and happiness.  Bit by bit, I’ve learned to play songs one after another--abet still the simplest ones in their eyes.

听到我弹琴的声音,两个孩子都竞相成为我的钢琴老师,一个赛着一个的要给我上课,提供辅导。我的儿子叫道:“妈,你的指法错了!你的手掌那么僵硬,手指太紧张!” “你的左手要放松!”具有“绝对音感”天赋的女儿对我弹奏的每一个错音都非常敏感,有时她会从浴室中奔下楼去,在我的耳旁喊道:“是F键,不是F#!!”

Hearing me playing, both my kids have jumped on board, taking me as their first student and falling over each other with offering me piano lessons. “Your fingering was wrong, mom, and your hands were too tight and stressed!” “Relax on your left hand!”  advised my son. My daughter, who has the talent of “perfect pitch” could figure out my every single wrong note instantly and would rush downstairs from her bathroom to shout in my ear. “It is F, not F#!”



渐渐地,残缺不全的音符凑成了完美的曲目,让我对自己的成绩都感到震惊。

Gradually, broken notes turned into beautiful pieces, leaving me in awe of my achievements.

“不错!这个曲子可以过了!”

“Yes! You can pass that song!”

“弹的好!不简单!”

“Very well played! Quite impressive!!!”

我高兴至极,我为自己能打破那个“岁数大了学不了钢琴”的心理障碍而万分自豪。

I am delighted and thrilled -- for breaking the phycological barrier that it is too late for people like me to start learning piano.



作为我练琴的鼓励,他们有时会坐到我身边和我来一曲四手联弹。

As a gesture of encouragement, one of them would sit down with me together in front of the piano, playing four hands together.

这是每一个做父母的都最为向往最难以忘怀的时刻!

That was the most exciting moments that any parent could have ever dreamed of! 

我为自己能以这一新的爱好去填补生活空虚感到高兴,但在音乐征程上与孩子们建立的新的感情纽带给我带来了更大的满足感。在语言,文化隔阂给移民家庭造成更大代沟的今天,这种与孩子们间的共同音乐爱好尤其显得难得,珍贵!

I was happy for the newfound paths to fill the emptiness in my life but more grateful for the enhanced emotional bonds with my children as we embark on a musical journey together.   At the time when language and cultural barriers widen the generation gaps among immigrant families, this common music interest seems more valuable to us than ever.
 


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